Madonna is your Super Bowl XLVI halftime show performer but as was the case with the Rolling Stones back in 2006, there is a laundry list of songs that cannot and will not appear on television screens across the world on February 5

Let’s dive into some of the songstress’s tunes unlikely to be performed on Super Bowl Sunday:

1. Justify My Love

Key Verse:

I wanna kiss you in Paris
I wanna hold your hand in Rome
I wanna run naked in a rainstorm
Make love in a train cross-country
You put this in me
So now what, so now what?

Translation: Madonna is worried about your third-down conversion percentages.

2. Erotic

Key Verse:

Give it up, do as I say
Give it up and let me have my way
I’ll give you love, I’ll hit you like a truck
I’ll give you love, I’ll teach you how to …

Translation: Madonna is worried that your inexperience is not suitable.

3. Like A Virgin

Key Verse:

Like a virgin
Touched for the very first time
Like a virgin
When your heart beats
Next to mine

Translation: Yep.

4. Like A Prayer

Key Verse:

When you call my name, it’s like a little prayer.
I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you there.
In the midnight hour, I can feel your power.
Just like a prayer, you know I’ll take you there

Translation: Madonna wants to take you somewhere. I’m guessing it’s not the Dolphins game or a visit to church.

5. Papa Don’t Preach

Key Verse:

Papa don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep
Papa don’t preach, I’ve been losing sleep
But I made up my mind, I’m keeping my baby, oh
I’m gonna keep my baby, mmm…

Translation: Madonna is pro-life. She is keeping her baby, oh, she’s gonna keep her baby, mmm…

6. Revolver

Key Verse:

Oops I guess I shot ya
My finger’s on the trigger
I had a bullet with your name on it
Click click
I’m a sex pistol
My love should be illegal
Real deal baby
I’m no counterfeit
Click click

Translation: Madonna is to coitus what Aaron Rodgers is to the quarterback position this season.

7. Bad Girl

Key Verse:

Bad girl drunk by six
Kissing some kind stranger’s lips
Smoke too many cigarettes today
I’m not happy, I’m not happy

Translation: Madonna would have been a great Raiderette in the 70s.

8. Open Your Heart

Key Verse:

Open your heart to me, baby
I’ll hold the lock and you hold the key
Open your heart to me, darlin’
I’ll give you love if you, you turn the key

Translation: Madonna says conservatism and a closed-mind yield empty results.

9. Candy Shop

Free Verse:

I’ll be your one stop (One stop)
Candy shop (Candy shop)
Everything (Everything)
That I got (That I got)
I’ll be your one stop (One stop)
Candy store (Candy store)
Lollipop (Lollipop)
Have some more (Have some more)

Translation: Madonna likens herself to candy store. These lyrics could also be in reference to the Green Bay Packers offensive playbook.

10. Where Life Begins

Key Verse:

So won’t you go down where it’s warm inside
Go down where I cannot hide
Go down where all life begins
Go down that’s where my love is

Now what could be better than a home cooked meal
How you want to eat it depends on how you feel
You can eat all you want and you don’t get fat
Now where else can you go for a meal like that
It’s not fair to be selfish or stingy
Every girl should experience eating out
Sometimes when I come home from a hard day at work
I swear it’s all I can think about

Translation: Madonna requires you to be well-rounded. In football terms, you better be multi-dimensional by throwing and running effectively.

Expect the playlist to be the proverbial “three yards and a cloud of dust” set from Madonna.

In other words, the Material Girl isn’t as saucy publicly as she once was; thus, the music set will be safe, safer, and safest.