News and Notes

NFL Preseason Weekend: This Head’s For You

While you were at Tootsie’s Bar & Grill drinking expresso martinis all weekend, here is a look at the NFL fun you missed…

(If you missed Thursday’s action, get caught up.)

BENGALS 17, JETS 6: 

THE SKINNY:  Mark Sanchez and Tim Tebow are still painfully ordinary. Nothing says sleepy time like that duo going a combined 8 of 14 for 48 yards and an interception. By the way, quick exercise…take out a pen and paper. Write down the other Jets receivers not named Santonio Holmes. Good luck with that.

BROWNS 19, LIONS 17:

THE SKINNY: What did Mohamed Massaquoi do to the NFL gods to deserve such awful treatment? He suffered a concussion while catching a pass from rookie quarterback Brandon Weeden on Friday night. To those unfamiliar, Massaquoi’s greatest career achievement to date is being on the receiving end of James Harrison’s Sports Illustrated cover-making, concussion-creating hit:

Meanwhile, hopefully Cleveland doesn’t fall for the “banana in the tailpipe” trick with Colt McCoy, who is probably going to beat up second-string defenses during the entire preseason.

JAGUARS 32, GIANTS 31: 

THE SKINNY: Victor Cruz caught one pass for 28 yards but wants you to know that he is very skeptical about replacement officials. Elsewhere, Division III powerhouse Mount Union College strikes again. Receiver Cecil Shorts caught a three-yard touchdown from Jacksonville’s Blaine Gabbert to open the scoring.

BUCCANEERS 20, DOLPHINS 7:

THE SKINNY: So, Chad Johnson’s weekend was pretty lousy. He dropped a pass during Miami’s loss to Tampa on Friday; got arrested on a domestic violence charge on Saturday; and then, was cut on Sunday.

CHIEFS 27, CARDINALS 17: 

THE SKINNY: Kevin Kolb…1 of 5, 21 yards….John Skelton…3 of 6, 35 yards, and an interception. Woof.

49ERS 17, VIKINGS 6:

THE SKINNY: San Francisco ran for 260 yards including a 78-yard touchdown run by backup quarterback Colin Kaepernick. Randy Moss made his return to the NFL in quiet fashion. He played four snaps and did not make a reception.

TEXANS 26, PANTHERS 13:

THE SKINNY: Jonathan Stewart signed a five-year extension that reportedly includes $22.5 million guaranteed. Hmmm…didn’t they do this last year too? Indeed. DeAngelo Williams signed a five-year contract with $21 million guaranteed. So, $43.5 million in guaranteed money to two backs on the same team? That defense could use a few of those dollars.

SEAHAWKS 27, TITANS 17:

THE SKINNY: Seriously, how ugly are these jerseys?

COLTS 38, RAMS 3:

THE SKINNY: Just going to throw this out there, when do we classify Sam Bradford as a bust? My patience is growing thin after Bradford admitted he hasn’t recovered from a high ankle sprain from last season. Let’s get it together bro.

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