super bowl

The Second Annual JMRA Not-So-Official Super Bowl LI Drinking Game

patriotsfalconsAs Super Sunday lurks in just a few days between Atlanta and New England, it is time for the return of the Super Bowl Drinking Game.

Super Bowl LI airs on FOX with Joe Buck and three-time Super Bowl champion Troy Aikman on the call. Erin Andrews and Chris Myers will have sideline duties.

Alas, I proudly present the second annual JMRA Not-So-Official Super Bowl Drinking Game.

One drink:

  • Every touchdown pass.
  • A Donald Trump mention.
  • Every catch by Falcons receiver Julio Jones
  • Every catch by Patriots wide receiver Julian Edelman.
  • A Deflategate mention.
  • A Vic Beasley sack.
  • Every time injured New England Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski is shown in a luxury box.
  • Every time Buck says Chris Hogan played lacrosse.
  • A Falcons completion over 20 yards.
  • If highlights are shown from the last Super Bowl in Houston…when the Patriots defeated the Carolina Panthers.
  • If Malcolm Butler’s Super Bowl winning interception from Super Bowl XLIX is shown.
  • Every time Troy Aikman says “you’re absolutely right Joe.”
  • When you hear the word, “inexperienced.”
  • Every time LeGarrette Blount scores a touchdown.
  • If Lady Gaga plays “Edge of Glory.”
  • FOX replay analyst Mike Pereira makes an appearance.
  • A promo for the Skip Bayless show “Undisputed” airs.
  • A promo for 24 Legacy airs.
  • A Joe Montana mention.
  • A Terry Bradshaw mention.
  • Every time Rutgers is mentioned.
  • Every time Boston College is mentioned.
  • Roger Goodell appears on camera.

Two drinks

  • Every Tom Brady QB sneak.
  • A Matt Ryan rushing touchdown.
  • A live or taped appearance from John Elway.
  • A Tom Brady rushing touchdown.
  • Tom Brady wins Super Bowl MVP.
  • Matt Ryan wins Super Bowl MVP.
  • A Patriots completion over 20 yards.
  • A Tevin Coleman touchdown run or catch.
  • A Martellus Bennett touchdown catch.
  • A Chris Hogan touchdown catch.
  • A James White touchdown catch.
  • A Dion Lewis rushing or receiving touchdown.
  • A Dion Lewis fumble.
  • A camera shot of Patriots owner Robert Kraft.
  • A camera shot of Falcons owner Arthur Blank.
  • Julio Jones leaves the game because of his foot injury.
  • If the Patriots score in the first quarter – NOTE: They never scored a first quarter point in the previous six Super Bowl appearances during the Brady/Belichick era.
  • Stephen Gostkowski misses a field goal or extra point.
  • If Robert Kraft slurs his speech during a postgame celebration talk.
  • Every Falcons sack.
  • A safety.
  • A defensive TD. There has been a defensive TD in every Super Bowl since XLI except for XLII, XLVI, XLIX, which all featured the Patriots, who don’t fall for other team’s parlor tricks in Super Bowls.

Three drinks:

  • If New England wins the coin toss….and chooses to receive to start the game.
  • JJ Watt is at the game.
  • The traditional camera shot of Brady hugging and kissing owner Robert Kraft before the game starts.
  • Every Patriots sack.
  • A Taylor Gabriel touchdown catch.
  • If you hear the term, “PSI.”
  • If you hear the term “Spygate.”
  • Buck mentions the infamous Michael Vick dog scandal.
  • A Bobby Petrino mention is made.
  • Brady throws a deep pass to special teams ace Matthew Slater, which is a potential panic sign in New England’s offense when they face overpowering defenses.
  • A pick-six.
  • A special teams TD.
  • If Arthur Blank dances after the game.

One shot:

  • If Bill Belichick smiles.
  • If Vic Beasley wins Super Bowl MVP.
  • If Aldrick Robinson or James Devlin scores a touchdowns.
  • If Lady Gaga does anything directly in protest of Donald Trump.
  • If Dan Quinn quotes a rap song during his post-game speech (He has done this before).

Two shots:

  • If FOX shows the Helmet Catch.
  • If FOX makes a “Grits Blitz” reference.
  • A post-game interview by FOX with Tom Brady Sr.
  • If Buck references Eugene Robinson’s arrest prior to Super Bowl XXXIII.
  • If Martellus Bennett dances with the New England Patriots cheerleaders.
  • If someone other than Tom Brady wins Super Bowl MVP for New England.

Bottle:

  • FOX shows a clip of from the last Super Bowl halftime show in Houston…the infamous Janet Jackson wardrobe malfunction halftime show.
  • A post-game interview with Michael Vick.
  • A post-game interview with MC Hammer.
  • A Barstool Sports mention is made.
  • Brady punches/slaps Roger Goodell in the face.
  • Brady refuses to shake Goodell’s hand.
  • If the game comes down to the final play.
  • Game goes into overtime.

This is for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY.

Good luck to you and your liver.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s